Good Guys, Bad Guys; White Hats, Black Hats

All the NRA had to do was keep quiet in the wake of the Sandy Hook massacre. Just blank all the noise about gun control because something new will come along to fill our screens. Like snow. Instead they (and "they" are without doubt a committee laden with consultants) decided to muddy the waters with the heavily armed Good Guys protecting schools from the Bad Guys scheme. After some outrage and careful explanation of how this scheme will not work (see below), and a few fleeting photo ops (Photoshops?) of volunteer gunmen in front of a school, the world for 99.99% of us will be the same as before Adam Lanza ever picked up a gun.
But I figured out where the NRA got their idea.

New NRA School Patrol

All those old Western movies where the good guy wears a white hat and the bad guy wears a black hat- it's all so obvious.

The bad guys buy the land under the school and want to put up a tannery. Or something. Gene Autry, or Red Ryder, or anyone in a white hat battle away until they get the deed that shows Old Widow Crocker donated the land to the county. Or similar. The good guy always wins despite overwhelming odds because we're not supposed to notice the bad guys telegraphing every punch. Good, bad, simple- it's the American Way! What, do you hate America?
I live near an elementary school and I will demonstrate how the super school patrol can fail. Where will the new guard be? Standing out front? Maybe for a day or two in fair weather. Then he will settle into a routine of dozing by the front door, checking out the MILFs when they come in, gently resting in a pile of powdered sugar as nothing happens for days, years on end.

Future NRA School Patrol

All future Adam Lanza has to do is-

1. 1- Drive an unremarkable white van (delivery, trades?) around back (two- no- three ways in) and shoot through the windows.
2. 2- Park on an adjacent street and walk in.
3. 3- he could wait until school gets out and take his chances from an adjoining driveway.

It doesn't take a genius to see the NRA scheme is doomed to failure- it didn't work in Sandy Hook. But I had fun looking for the illustrations.
Hi Ho Excelsior- away!

Spare a Thought for the Atheists

The subject of God came up in connection with the massacre at Sandy Hook school in Newtown, CT. God, gods, spirits, angels- anything supernatural is the construct of the human mind. Did you see the ghost of a deceased loved one? So have I. Only later I realized I was asleep- a dream- a fancy of brain chemistry.

 You may think you are selfless and giving when you pray for someone. In reality you are just patting yourself on the back for… nothing. Words and good will are meaningless, to say you are praying for me is the ultimate insult. Nothing would send me to an early grave as soon as waking in a hospital bed to see a priest (the Church I left). Do me and millions (billions?) more a favor and keep your prayers to yourself.

How Can I Have Skipped Candlepin Bowling?

Below is a video of the late great Stasia Czernicki. Whatever her accomplishment on the lanes, she lives on in our family because she was Polish and from central Mass. Central Massachusetts is that flyover country between 495 and Northampton. You went to the Worcester Centrum once and got lost both ways. Anyway, notice how you hold the ball in your hand in a manner obvious to any human from the Rift of Africa forward. No holes for fingers and twisted wrist movements. I worked in a garment factory where one day we were cutting red webbing for suspenders from rolls with thick cardboard cores in the middle. I decided they looked liked candlepins, so three of us taped rolls into taller pins, used the webbing as bumpers, with rubber band balls (made earlier) about the right size, and spent a few hours bowling in a back corner. Worked great! No holes, simple pins. Apparently hitting just the 2 and 8 is a "half Worcester."